My Doulas Birth Story
Whether you are a mom to be, seasoned in labor, trying to conceive, planning, or the partner in training. I would love to share my birthing story with you. What better way to aide in your decision making about a Doula by getting to know me a bit more before I even know you.
I will like to share with you the story of my pregnancy and labor of my as I write this my 3 year old son Zion. I chose to be transparent in regards to the events, since I realized that life is the truth. Sharing to those who may have been through similar situations to know that you're not alone but can triumph still!
- June 2013 - My son was conceived.
- July 2013 - We find out my son is conceived.
- August 2013 - Diagnosed with Stage I Cervical Cancer. Finding out during prenatal visit.
- September 2013 - Excitement looking at the growing baby bump.
- October 2013 - My son's father and I separated.
- November 2013 - Determination set in Fighting Back with a Vegan Lifestyle.
- December 2014 - Second Trimester Glow in Full Affect!
- January 2014 - Are we There Yet? What are feet's?
- February 2014 - Over being pregnant. Anxiety also kicking in.
- March 2014 - He's Here! About Time! ...But not as I had planned.
- April 2014 - Post Partum Depression -
Per the timeline above I decided to highlight major evens that occurred during each month of my actual pregnancy. By the time my last month came around I have been through quite a lot and was anxious to have my son. Through-out my pregnancy I had gotten diagnosed with Cervical Cancer which I later learned, that dormant illness could surface from a woman suppressed immune system. Life later reveals itself and I had become a single pregnant woman in college working and becoming strictly vegan to help with my present health state. Throughout my months I took it upon myself to study as much as I could about a woman's body during pregnancy and what occurs during Labor. My studies in college at the time where centered on Kiniseology, Human Nutrition and Childhood development so it went right along with my desires. I was determined to have a full blown un-medicated birth.
36 weeks: onward I had gained a lot of weight quickly and had developed a fluid like sack that I could feel at the bottom of my belly. Due to this, I was being monitored closely because the OB/GYN's suspected that I may have been a mis-diagnosed during my glucose test. - Meaning it was told I did not have pregnancy induced Diabetes. However they believed that I may had indeed developed it. What exactly does this mean? - Well for me they made it clear that I would not be able to labor in the pool or in water because I would have to be in constant monitor during my labor.
38 weeks: came and I was at one of my prenatal visits. The doctors spoke in regards to my weight gain and concerns for the child's size. Stating that should I not go into labor by the end of the 39th week that they would induced me. You can imagine this not sitting well with me. As I had done my studying knowing that the longer the child is in there the better development wise it is for him.
My mother and brother had decided to come in to town as I was nearing the final week of my pregnancy. It was Saturday March 15th normal day. I told my mother and brother to go to the store and not to worry about it I would be fine. They had been there for a few days and did not want to leave my sight out of fear of me going into labor. They took my advise and left to the store. Through out the day I had been feeling contractions but I honestly believe I did not notice them or took it seriously.
Around this time everything seem to be uncomfortable a bit so I did not think it was solely contractions. As usual I lite one of my candles and sat down on my Yoga ball and rocked myself back and forth trying to calm down. Then the pressure started to intencify a bit to where I really noticed it coming in waves. At this time I decided to start timing them, and to my surprise was indeed in labor contraction being 4-5 minutes apart. I became a bit concerned but maintain composure. Calling my mother to come back home thinking it may be time and calling the hospital to make them aware of me coming - which was about 45 minutes away.
6:30pm I arrived at the hospital, the physician examined to see how far I was dilated and told me I was at 5 cm and asked me how I was so calm? To my ignorance at the time I asked am I not supposed to be what exactly does this mean do I have to come back? - haha. They took me to the room and was left there to labor. By this time my dad and Zion father where notified and joined as well. I made it clear to the physicians that I would not be laboring on the bed because that was THEE worse position possible for a laboring mother.
Brought my yoga ball and found my comfort just as I would at home. I sat on in and rocked around back and forth. Leaning against the bed when needed. As the contractions came in their waves my way of easing through them where to One - Hum. Two - Sing. or Three - Tell a joke. My mother and Zion father would alternate giving me back massages as I went along. Truth be told, the scary movie scenes that they paint in this society of mothers being in full blown agony and yelling from the top of their lungs was not my case and I don't believe it is the case for many. I educated myself and remain focus as possible and allowed my body to take its course.
Hitting my 10 cm: I did it. The OB comes and checks my dilation and states that I am at full dilation. Relief came to me knowing that I dilated fully without medications and still maintaining my composure the birthing should really start now, so I thought. Right after informing me that I hit 10 cm she also told me that he was not engaging and that I was going to need a C-Section. You can imagine my frustration and fear kicked in - at this point is when I started to cry and tremors came about my body from the stress. Not only this, as they where peeping me to take me to the OP room the nurse checked my fluids and said to the OB I believe her water popped and I witnessed the OB waive her off and state it's too late we are still going to go through with it. I will never forget this moment of how I wish that someone would be there to remind me to help me advocate for myself neither I nor Zion where in immediate distress to have a NEED for the procedure.
From here on the experience became a bit traumatic for me. I was rushed to the OP room, and I became terrified. I laugh about it now how I was yelling to the anesthisiologist that I did not want to throw up - I have a phobia of throwing up and had not done so since being pregnant. I squeezed his arm and was crying that I just didnt want to throw up. He replied to me I will give you something that will make you feel better. I remember being in there and feeling so out of place asking for my sons father when he would be in. Everything about Natural went out the door and I kept asking myself why am I here for? The findings of the nurse stuck to me, and I felt as though I missed my chance to labor longer to see if indeed he would drop and I could of birth him. However, this did not occur and Zion's father came in and the procedure was on it's way. As they pulled Zion out I could hear the whole room break out into what seem like a live auction "Oh he has to be 9 pounds" " No 10!" " No 11" . 2 am March 16th he was here full grown 10.3lbs . Right as they took him out they weight him, measured him, and had his father cut the umbilical cord right away.
As I look back there is so much wrong with this picture, and realized this hospital is far from baby friendly at all. I cannot even recall if I got to hold him right away.
From here all I can remember is being back in my recovery room, having out of body experience with the medication they had gave me and me trying to connect with my newborn knowing that I couldn't stay up long enough to do so the first few hours. Even having a moment where I was feeding Zion and I looked down at him, and he verbally said to me "Mom I want more" I looked at him and then I looked up at my mother who was sitting across from me on the other bed and told her "Mom he said he wants more! What do I do?" LOL! Yes! So far out of it. Two days later we where dismissed and set to go home.
My first few nights at home where hard, I struggled with breast feeding and all the trouble that comes along with it. I was extremely emotional although I would try to contain it. When my mother left, and I was left alone with my son is when we really started to bond. During this time I was unaware of what was going on with me as I went through the motions. It wasn't until about Zion turn one years old that I realized that the past few months I had been battling fiercely with the "Baby Blues" or called Post Partum Depression that whole entire year. There where nights where I would stay up with Zion and just cry the whole night away. Desiring not to take care of myself as I should, but my focus and commitment to one my faith, and two my son really allowed me to make it through. These two things became my sole driving force to continue each and everyday.
Here I am three almost four years later. I have a healthy advance for his age breast-fed until two baby boy - or threenager now haha. Although my experience was far from what I originally had planned and anticipated I would not change it. But I can change my future ones! Not forgetting one the most life altering events of my life - My Birth into becoming a mother and having a son. I find myself in the journey of wanting to be fully committed to serving mother's during their birthing experience.
Be that voice of reminder.
Serve as a comforter.
Serving mother's as they birth their Tribes.